LAMB: What on earth happened to your eye? You look like you've been in a pub brawl. It started looking a bit puffy yesterday morning but by the afternoon you could hardly open it. We were going to take you to the doctor but it has improved considerably since yesterday and it doesn't seem to bother you in the slightest. However, I have noticed when we're out and about a few people looking at you with sympathy then eying me with suspicion - I've become the woman of questionable character. I can just see the ladies at the op-shop shake their heads and say with a tsk "....always the quiet ones".

Although, looking at this photo I'm not sure I blame them.